The Butterfly Excursion

A naive caterpillar views butterflies soaring above with disdain; oblivious to the truth that becoming a butterfly is also her destiny. A discerning caterpillar relishes incubation and is intently focused on absorbing the wisdom, soaking up the divine guidance, storing up the sacred courage that is activated and kicked into high gear when convinced that the inner splendor in its midst has been given permission to soar.                                                          

- Michelle Hollinger

When women submit to a tattoo artist’s ink, a butterfly is frequently the preferred image; and with good reason: the life of a butterfly holds remarkable parallels to a woman’s evolution.

The caterpillar’s emergence from its cocoon, where internally, significant work takes place in preparation for its ascent into the winged life of the majestic butterfly, is a powerful metaphor for the woman who understands the adage, “as within, so without.”

The butterfly parallel resonates because it is steeped in our innate longing to emerge as the woman we are here to become. It intrigues because life is about evolving and we assume that our ascension to the level where our best self hangs out is a given; that we will begin to click on all cylinders – fully immersed in our calling, enjoying the abundance that flows easily from sharing our passion, engaging in harmonious relationships with parents, children and with a soul mate also living their truth; standing serenely in our authenticity – our “yeses” meaning yes and our “nos” no; owning our voice, speaking up courageously, demonstrating to others how we are to be treated by loving ourselves deeply and honoring ourselves unapologetically.

The mere passage of time does not ensure ascension. What happens during the passage of time determines whether we decide, once and for all, to grab that elusive aspiration because we deserve to know, in this lifetime, what it feels like to finally achieve a cherished goal, like releasing the stubborn excess weight, ditching the paycheck to paycheck merry-go-round, or peacefully exiting the outgrown relationship.

If the passage of time involves shutting off the external noise and listening to our own voice, we could arrive at the unmistakable truth that it’s up to us and only us to transition from what feels safe to what is true.

If the passage of time includes getting to know who we really are, then we’ll invest time enough with our inner splendor to know that allowing it to linger in what is essentially confined space can kill us because it doesn’t belong there – it’s supposed to be expressed, its wings are meant to expand.

If the passage of time involves connecting with the goddess within, even the pristine among us may passionately whisper, mostly to ourselves, “fuck the comfort zone,” it’s time to step boldly into MY zone – the zone that has my name on it and frees me to dance for no reason and sing on key or off as though no one is listening.

If the passage of time involves deep, inner excursions, comparisons will end as the delicious uniqueness of our path reaches up and clutches our heart, refusing to let go until we surrender to its beauty; and we not only refuse to covet someone else’s journey, we finally comprehend that everything – every single thing - our childhood experiences,  our families of origin and choice; our detours and joys and passions and flaws and assets are parts of OUR unique puzzle that fit perfectly when we embrace them as divine fuel for manifesting OUR authentic life. 

If, after passage of its cocooned time, a caterpillar has completed the internal work and is ready to emerge, but doesn’t, it will cease to exist because it did not ascend to its reason for existing. It dies a natural death and is eaten by other insects and small animals in the great circle of life. 

If, during her passage of time, a woman does not engage her inner splendor, if she does not become an archeologist in her own life, if she doesn’t use her time to turn inward to the innate courage and power poised to leap with her into her reason for existence, she, too, dies a natural death.

Although the date of her burial may be in the distant future – she is essentially among the walking dead; those people who continue to move and breathe but no longer exist because stepping fully into their existence took a back seat to fear, others’ opinions,  an addiction to  "coulda, woulda, shouldas" and a flat out refusal to soar. 

Your Thoughts Are Calling!

Chaos and confrontation have become celebrated forms of entertainment. Spreading gossip under the guise of celebrity reporting is an accepted part of our daily existence, and the more ratchet the reality show, the higher the ratings.

Social media’s benign seduction lulls people into devoting exorbitant amounts of time to posting, sharing, liking and tweeting; providing a false sense of connection and pseudo-validation to folk genuinely craving something more.

There’s a twisted type of irony at play when parents post pictures of themselves at dinner with their children and then spend half the dinner responding to strangers who praise them for spending time with their children. Families’ already tenuous connections have fallen prey to social media’s lure.

Also, the rampant preoccupation with seeking others’ approval and staying atop trending topics means that the inward focus necessary for bringing our own dreams and goals to reality is knocked off course.  

Viewing faithfully and posting incessantly feels harmless, but these are not victimless spectator sports. The biggest victim is the person who cannot hear the call of her own thoughts because they are drowned out by the thoughts of others. 

And while watching occasionally could be considered a "guilty pleasure," the danger arrives when the pleasure becomes guilty of subtly distracting women from becoming who they are here to become and doing what they are here to do. 

Here’s the thing, the noisier our external world becomes, the more imperative it is to embrace inward silence. Personal growth, spiritual development and moving forward along our uniquely defined paths are all aspects of an inside-out process. 

Meditation, the practice of sitting alone quietly, going within and connecting with that part of us that reveals to us who we are, what we’re here to do and how to make it happen, is an extremely powerful, increasingly important part of a well-lived life. 

Interested in learning to meditate? Join Michelle Hollinger, host of The Sisterhood Exchange radio show, which airs Wednesdays at 8:30pm, for The Butterfly Excursion - a 6-week journey that will teach you to meditate in a way that suits your personality, show you how to dissolve the fear that is blocking your progress, guide you on how to create a vision board to expedite the achievement of your goals; and so much more. 

Mango Season

 

The sprouting buds on mango trees are an indication that when summer rolls around, the sweet, juicy tropical fruit will be available in abundant supply. 

As a mango lover, I am ecstatic. A mango purist, I'll indulge in a tasty mango shake or mango a la mode with good vanilla ice-cream; however, nothing compares to a firm, yellow, not too ripe mango sliced thickly, but not too thick, eaten sans accompaniments of any kind. Etiquette does not apply here - sticky fingers and a mango-stained face only enhance the enjoyment factor. Better to dig in as a solo excursion or with others similarly inclined to indulge in mango messiness.

In addition to its unrivaled deliciousness and ability to engage all five senses, the mango buds tell an even deeper story that the metaphysical student in me also savors. The buds that appear in early spring will manifest into beautiful, fully formed fruit come summer, but the sprouting buds did not arrive overnight. 

Their presence is evidence of inner work; of the invisible being made visible; of that whole "as within so without" masterpiece that divine energy orchestrates through each of its inhabitants.

The mango tree has no say in its blooming process, but being created to fulfill a predetermined purpose has its benefits. The mango tree doesn't have to decide whether to produce oranges or apples or coconuts. Its lack of free will notwithstanding, the mango tree stands as a powerful metaphor for humanity's sole possessor of free will: human beings

It stands as evidence of spiritual law; which is irrefutable and precise - the inner determines the outer. In the case of humans, the inner refers to our thoughts. What we think about, we bring about; as a man/woman thinketh, so he/she is, etc. 

Today's life circumstances are the manifestation of past thoughts. Future experiences are being crafted now, with today's thoughts.

When the harvest for your current thoughts comes to bloom, will you welcome your creation, or will you need another mango season?

Pin Pricks

Acupuncture is an ancient Eastern medical practice that balances the body's energy or Chi. It is an effective way to alleviate pain, discomfort and to help optimize the body's functioning and self-healing abilities. 

The painless procedure involves the practitioner placing super tiny needles into the patient's body. If a particular ailment is being remedied, the needles will be placed in and near the area of the ailment in order to facilitate the flow of beautiful healing energy. 

I used it years ago as a part of a prevention regime to keep me balanced. Now that I've hit 50, I plan to resume acupuncture as a part of my wellness routine so that my mind, body and soul behave like fine wine - we get better with time. 

My intention to reintroduce acupuncture into my life got me to wondering about other possible benefits of the ancient practice. What if the insertion of the needles also serves a deeper, more spiritual purpose?

What if each pin prick serves as an outlet through which our inner splendor can escape? 

What if by activating the beautiful energy within us we also activate strength, courage and wisdom; the strength, courage and wisdom necessary to write the book, launch the small business, obtain the degree, show up for the audition, leave the toxic relationship?

What if the authentic power that we need to create the life that we've only allowed ourselves to fantasize about can be unleashed - one super tiny pin prick at a time?

What if the inner splendor could be released whether we used acupuncture or not? What if?

Michelle Hollinger is the author of The Sisterhood Exchange. Purchase a copy at michellehollinger.com.

The Sisterhood Exchange

I see her on the screen,
on the job,
on the street;
Head held high, 
her eyes smile and see clearly through the bright light she casts.

She has danced with many partners;
fear,
rejection,
And at least one of the "isms;"
They now follow her lead.

I return her glance with smiling eyes,
whisper a brief thanks to Him for her,
silently transmit a warm 'you go girl,'
and bask in the glow of our mutual lights,
each strengthening the other through the energy exchange called sisterhood.

Michelle Hollinger is the author of The Sisterhood Exchange. Purchase a copy at michellehollinger.com.

Sisterhood exchanging with Stephanie

It was during a particularly challenging phase when my then 9-year old daughter and I weren't getting along as well as we could that I got my bright idea. Stephi was being her usual defiant self and I was frustrated and about ready to pull my hair out; but in my gut I believed that we had the potential to do better.

One day, "out of the blue," I sensed that if we could somehow improve the quality of the energy that flowed between us, we could improve our relationship. I explained my little experiment to Stephi and she reluctantly agreed to give it a shot. I asked her to stand, face me and with our eyes closed, for a few minutes we would think good, positive, loving thoughts about each other.

And that's what we did.

I was deeply moved by the exchange and could sense that Stephi was, too. I asked her if she wanted us to share our thoughts aloud and she said 'yes.' I got to tell her what a spunky, courageous and smart girl she was and she told me that I was a wonderful, supportive mother who always "had her back." These lovely thoughts were inside of us, but as long as we were "bumping heads," they never surfaced.

I believe that a shift occurred in our relationship that day. We still had challenging moments, but overall, the way that we approached each other changed, the way that we interacted changed and the way that we listened to each other changed. It's not perfect, (what relationship is?), but, today I share an authentic relationship with my daughter, who is now 20, which I believe began on the day of our 'exchange.'

That experience in the kitchen years ago prompted me to sit and write. Although I had a hunch that what was stirring inside of me would somehow address the energy exchanged between women, I had no idea that it would result in a book. As a writer, my obligation was to open myself to the process and allow Spirit to flow. The Sisterhood Exchange is what emerged.

Purchase a copy of The Sisterhood Exchange at michellehollinger.com.  

Jealousy or admiration?

The feeling commonly known as jealousy may actually be admiration in disguise. 

In order to understand how the two can be confused, it is necessary to accept that, from a spiritual perspective, we are all connected. Now consider that within us is a human mechanism that triggers a visceral response when we encounter a person who possesses a quality that we believe ourselves to be lacking. Even if the so-called jealousy is about some material possession, the visceral response is to the human quality that made the acquisition of the material possession possible.

Here’s where the fine line between jealousy and admiration begins to blur. 

We’re not actually lacking the quality. Spiritually speaking, the only way for us to notice the quality in someone else is for us to also have it within ourselves. Its seed is within us waiting for us to spend valuable time with it; to water it and nurture it so that it blossoms into what it is intended to become. Because we have not paid it the attention that it deserves, seeing it in full bloom in someone else reminds us subconsciously where we’re slacking and that produces the feeling commonly known as jealousy.

  

We’ve been conditioned to respond to our triggers in this manner and in this manner alone; but it produces no benefits. Actually, continuing to respond this way is easy, but stressful. Easy because it requires nothing from us; stressful because it guarantees jealousy remains a permanent fixture in our lives.

Shifting from the toxic, energy-sapping emotion that jealousy is to the expansive, life-affirming quality of admiration requires that we spend some time exploring and taking ownership of our triggers. It requires searching within for the quality seed that is awaiting our attention; and deciding whether to roll up our sleeves to water it or allow it to shrivel by maintaining our status quo. 

It also requires a willingness to admit (at least to ourselves) that we actually admire the person in possession of the quality; which means our ego has to take a backseat. Admiration is not for the faint at heart. It is a big, powerful quality because inherent in admiration is gratitude to the person for triggering an inner awareness that could serve as a springboard to a greater life.

Michelle Hollinger is the author of The Sisterhood Exchange. Purchase a copy at michellehollinger.com.